All posts tagged: stillbirth

cuddling a newborn

Stillbirth and Covid

“At St George’s, a teaching hospital in south London, stillbirths rose from 2.38 per 1,000 births pre-pandemic, to 9.31 per 1,000 births between Feb 1 and June 14.”The Times, September 30th This is a truly heartbreaking statistic. According to SANDS: Every day in the UK 14 babies die before, during or shortly after birth – and I remember reading about concerns that the stillbirth rate would increase during lockdown. There will be more to learn about why stillbirths increased during this time but, during lockdown, maternity units were more restricted and guidance changed weekly. There was concern among pregnant women about catching Covid, about going into hospital on their own and about having less routine contact with their midwife. In different parenting forums and on social media, expectant mums were discussing whether to miss appointments and scans because they were scared. This pandemic has caused a great deal of additional stress and anxiety and expectant women and their families. And, for some women, they were unable to get to appointments or to the hospital in …

Surviving Babyloss

In the first few days and early weeks after my son died, I wished to feel normal again. I longed, not just for the pain to ease, but just to feel like myself again. It felt like I lived in a bubble, everyone around me was living their normal lives but I was in a very lonely, isolated bubble of vulnerability and pain. I have never felt pain like it – physical pain, mental pain that affected how much I could do, how much I could cope with, how much I could enjoy, how much I could focus on. I felt like I could break at any moment – each day was about forcing myself to get out of bed, to do something rather than just wallow; to do something rather than just desperately want my baby back. There was an aching in my arms for the baby I  couldn’t hold and a physical pain in my heart as it ached for what I had lost. In those early weeks I wasn’t sure how much …