Janine Smith, Mother Cuppa - 4th Trimester

Life with a newborn

Life with a newborn baby can feel a bit chaotic because no-one has all the answers with a baby. Those early days, weeks and months can be full of challenges and emotion. It can help to be kind to yourself, keep your days simple, give your baby time to adjust and take your time to get to know your baby.

  • Trust your instincts – cuddle, feed and carry your new baby to soothe and comfort. You will not be spoiling him, you will not be making a rod for your own back – you will be providing love, comfort and security.
  • Give yourself time to get to know your baby and time to adjust to your new life with them. You both need time to get to know each other, so you can get used to how your baby is communicating with you through sounds, cries, movement and behaviour.
  • As part of life with a newborn you may need to accept or ask for help – you do not need to be superwoman and feel that you need to do it all. If you need help or if you feel that you need a break for an hour or so – ask! You have not failed just because you need a hand.
  • Support each other, if you are part of a couple – when you are both tired, it is easy to squabble and to compare how tired you are or how much work each other has to do. Communicate and talk and give yourself some time – your new baby means you are adapting to life as a family, or as a growing family if this isn’t your first baby.
  • Try to get out of the house most days, even just for a little while. Enjoy a change of scene – even just going for a walk will give you some fresh air and some exercise will can help to enhance feelings of wellbeing. It can also be helpful to seek out other mothers as well for support, shared experiences and some chat.
  • Life with a newborn means going with the flow. You are probably used to being in control of your day and a baby well and truly turns this upside down. On a great day you might feel like superwoman – you have met all your babies needs, you are dressed, you are also fed, you have cooked dinner and maybe done the washing and also fitted in a baby group too.On a-not-so-good day you might have a grumpy baby, who is hard to settle. You may have snacked on junk, couldn’t face the baby group, you could still be in your pj’s at 5pm and there’s no dinner planned or made. This is ok! Enjoy the good days and accept the not-so-good ones.  
  • Don’t forget you have just given birth – chances are your hormones are all over the place, so you may be feeling emotional, you may be sore and you are trying to get to grips with meeting the needs of a new human being.
  • In those early few weeks, it may feel like you are doing very little but don’t underestimate how much effort it takes to look after a baby, especially on very little sleep. You are providing your baby with food, comfort, love and security to allow your baby to grow and develop. Ok, so maybe you don’t feel like you take on the world, let alone keep on top of the housework, cook and eat a meal but you are a mum and mum’s rock!
This entry was posted in: Janine Smith, Mother Cuppa - 4th Trimester

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An experienced specialist in pregnancy, birth & early parenting, I have worked with parents since 2002. I am based in the North East so I regularly work with parents from Newcastle, Northumberland, Gateshead and across North Tyneside. Face-to-face sessions will continue with North East parents but digital courses and online sessions means I can work with parents everywhere.